Natalya Mikhailovna Rutskaya from Krugly is one of those people who, entering any room, bring light with them. A smiling, good-natured, cheerful and sincere woman admits that in her life there has always been a dream - to have a big family, a bright house in which children's laughter would ring. And it so happened that she met her great love - husband Sergei Lobkov . Their desires matched. They are raising their four children and 6 adopted. At the end of last year, an important anniversary was celebrated here - 10 years since they became a foster family. And Natalya Mikhailovna also became the owner of the title "Woman of the Year - 2022" in the nomination "Maternal Glory". It is a high reward and a great responsibility to bear such a title. But the most important reward for a mother, Natalya believes, is the happiness and well-being of her children.
The big house greets guests with interest, several pairs of children's eyes peek out from behind Natalya Mikhailovna. In unison, everyone greets us and scatter in all directions. The children, says my mother, have enough things to do. Who to draw, who to play, who to help around the house.
“Our guys are always busy,” Mom smiles. - In a big house, no one is left behind. Our guys understand that comfort depends on everyone, you can’t sit here. And yes, they are always happy to help me. But such mutual understanding and trust in each other, in adults is a huge work and a great value.”
Being a parent and parent-educator in a family-type orphanage, says the mother, is a responsible and not always easy job. “I always wanted to have a big and friendly family. She herself grew up in a large family, her mother was also a foster parent-educator. Grandmother Maria Venediktovna from a large family. My family passed on rich experience to me, they taught me to be generous, sincere, merciful, show compassion for people and never pass by someone else's misfortune. They taught me that the greatest value in life is family. Strong, healthy, with its own traditions and necessarily filled with love and mutual respect. I really wanted to continue the good tradition of happy families. But here you can’t do it alone, she argues. - I was lucky to meet a man who shared my aspirations.
Natalya also tells the story of her marriage with a smile. “Sergei called me to marry, and I told him that first he had to pass the test. He didn't resist. She took him to the forest, said, that's how she will collect 5 liters of blueberries, then we'll talk about living together. So he brought me 10 of them. Well, how can you refuse such a purposeful one, ”Natalya laughs.
Any family is born in the ability of spouses to support each other. “When Sergei and I began to live, he worked as a security guard. But then an offer was received to go to study in order to further grow up the career ladder. He then doubted whether it was worth it, two children in his arms, and he should leave. I suffered a lot. But I immediately made it clear - we will not be lost and we will cope with everything. He studied, I looked at the children. We all grew up together: the children and we with them,” she said.
The career of her husband Sergei went uphill, and with it, the family grew larger. “All difficulties and difficulties must be passed side by side. Help and support each other, be able to hear and listen. The stronger the foundation, the stronger the family. And at some point we decided that four children are great, but there are kids who find themselves in a difficult life situation, who, apart from grief and tears, have not seen anything. They couldn't stay away. So we decided to take the children in as a foster family,” she recalls. - We had no fear, we knew perfectly well what we were agreeing to. And so the step was conscious. So we began to take under our wing the kids, who are still very small, but already broken. To teach them to be whole, to communicate and interact with each other, to be able to love and receive this love not for something, but just like that. Children come to us different,
Find an approach to everyone, warm and warm a child's heart, return to him the confidence that he is the greatest value. This is how they approach Natalya's upbringing in the family. “Now they are so friendly with us. And there were many difficulties. Children come with injuries. And not physical, but mental and sometimes psychological. Someone steals, someone fights at school. And steal most often not money - sweets. And not because they are so bad. Perhaps this is how they compensate for what they did not receive. And our task here is to repair the child's soul. To teach and show that society is kind, and people are good. That the world loves and cherishes them. And we start with our own example, - Natalya shares her secrets. We have many family traditions. And we actively involve each child. We share all household chores - because life and comfort can only be created together. If necessary, we resort to the help of psychologists. Not everything, unfortunately, can be cured with love.
“Children can be told something a thousand times, but they will still take an example from adults. That is why we try to be an example for them in everything. My husband works in the police - the boys are drawn to him, trying to be like dad. We definitely teach everyone to sports, everyone - according to his strength and health. Girls see an example of a caring mother, a responsible housewife - they try to help me. We have a farm, we all work together. We always participate in creative competitions, at home we come up with our own fun and traditions. On New Year's Eve, we definitely put a Christmas tree, and the children under the Christmas tree - each their own shoe. And if they behaved well, Grandfather Frost always leaves gifts for them at night, - mother shares family traditions. - But our Santa Claus is a very kind wizard. Even if someone is guilty, no one is left without gifts. And each child has his own envelope. When they give money or he earns it, we save it there. So that by the age of 18 there will be a small starting capital: for someone to study, to someone for the purchase of equipment.
Another important tradition of the adoptive family from Krugly is to keep in touch with the biological parents of adopted children. “Sooner or later questions arise. Therefore, we try to make sure that children communicate with their families. We had stories when parents were restored in their rights. And there is one mother who was very happy that her child came to us for upbringing, she said that he settled well. But she, too, cannot be blamed for what is happening. She grew up in a boarding school. She gave birth very young. And, probably, if she had another example before her eyes, so many destinies would not have been broken. The mother of the child often comes to visit us, helps with the housework. Tells children to appreciate the fact that they have a family. And now she seems to be an adult already, but she herself needs a family and support. This is an example of the fact that everything in the life of adults comes from childhood, - Natalya Mikhailovna shared. We also have a boy. He has health problems. He did not know his mother. We here, of course, raised everything to our ears. Mom was found in a psycho-neurological boarding school. We bought gifts, took the boy and went to her. And you know, it was the best decision. His mother all these years did not know what happened to her son, whether he was alive at all. I can’t tell you in words how much joy there was, because they had not seen each other for 14 years.”
The foster mother shared that she was not yet used to the title of “Woman of the Year”. “Of course, I understand what trust and what high appreciation lies in this award. But the realization has not yet come to an end. I am proud, of course, that I was selected from all over the Mogilev region. But, on the other hand, I'm just doing what I do best, what I love with all my heart, ”she said. - The other day we listened to the Address of the head of state. The President spoke about how important it is to preserve the classic family model, how important it is to preserve traditions and pass them on to the next generations. And we always follow this. Because we understand that children are our future. And what we give them today will be the foundation of tomorrow's society. If you want to raise a worthy generation, become an example for them in everything. Children are very responsive, they will follow you.”
Natalya Rutskaya admitted that she is a very happy woman. “I was lucky in everything: a loving husband, a house filled with children, a large, and most importantly, a happy family. Everything I dreamed about came true. And thanks to the fact that I was lucky enough to meet on my way not just a man, but a piece of my soul, ”she smiles warmly.
Natalia has only one dream left - to meet the President of Belarus Alexander Lukashenko. “Of course, I really want to meet him personally. Thank you for the policy of our state, for the fact that we have everything to raise children, create families, and realize ourselves as professionals. You probably won’t find such state support anywhere else,” she says.
In the meantime, we were talking, the kids gathered in the kitchen - lunch is ahead. A full table and a big tasty cake, chimes of plates and children's jokes. Someone modestly silent, someone laughs out loud. They are all so different. “But so beloved!” - emphasized Natalia Rutskaya.
